... ticks on and according to my little cow clock, its just a few minutes past midnight. (I have yet to name, thee, little white cow clock.)
I consider myself a rather disciplined person. There used to be a time when I would wake up without fail to the ring of an alarm everyday at the same time - just like clock-work. I remember Saturday mornings when I would wake up at 8 a.m. sharp even without an alarm. (Saturday morning cartoons started at 8 a.m.)
The interminable slew of days have drastically changed my sleeping habits and I have been procrastinating on having my body clock reset. Especially since I might be starting work pretty soon. The offer came from a source that I have thought off as dry. So here I go again, plunging in without knowing the full extent of what I am getting into. I have an appointment later on today to the agency to confirm things. I can only trust God that it will be well with me.
----- DISCLAIMER: The author may tend to ramble on in this entry as he has been repressing his blogging for no good reason. Skip to the end for more substantial reading. -----I was lying on my bed one night thinking how I wish that humans did not have to sleep or at least require fewer hours of sleep. I was lying on my back and just drifting in my thoughts when I remembered that one night, a few months ago, I was in the same sleeping position but in an extremely different circumstance.
It was my first night sleeping outfield. I still remember the sensation of the rocks and the roots on my back covered only by a thin layer of groundsheet. I remember the discomfort as I tried to adjust myself to the most comfortable position with nothing as a bolster except my M16 rifle. As I lay there I reassured myself that National Service will go by quickly and that in the blink of an eye it will be over. It was then that I made a mental bookmark of that situation.
True enough, as if in the blink of an eye, I found myself looking back at that mental bookmark. Slowly, I began to drift off into sleep as I thanked God that those days are long gone.
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I find it fascinating that an inordinate amount of time could feel like a split-second when traveling the realm of dreams.
I note one example when I set my alarm at a certain time and when it went off, I adjust the alarm to ring 30 minutes later as I wanted to snooze more and just when it felt like I had dozed off for a few seconds, 30 minutes have passed. Truly fascinating.
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I have grown accustomed to it and it seems so normal that I just do not know what to do. However strong my fondness may be, I have to make a choice - one that may be painful after all this time but it has to be done.
Although I am still figuring out what exactly I want, I guess there is nothing for it but to stick to my decision and get another haircut.
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Only time can tell the story that will unfold.
----- And now for more substantial reading -----Main Entry: substantial
Part of Speech: adjective
Definition: important, ample
Synonyms:
abundant,
big, big-deal,
bulky,
consequential,
considerable,
durable,
extraordinary,
firm,
generous,
goodly,
heavy,
heavyweight,
hefty,
key,
large,
major-league,
massive,
material,
meaningful,
momentous,
plentiful,
principal,
serious,
significant,
sizable,
solid,
sound,
stable,
steady,
stout,
strong,
sturdy,
superabundant,
tidy,
valuable,
vast,
weighty, well-built,
worthwhileNotes: substantial means considerable or sizeable; substantive means actual or firm
Antonyms:
insignificant,
little,
minor,
small,
unimportant,
unsubstantialMain Entry: substantial
Part of Speech: adjective
Definition: material, real
Synonyms:
actual, card-carrying,
concrete,
corporeal,
existent, for real,
honest-to-god*,
legit,
objective,
phenomenal,
physical,
positive,
righteous,
sensible,
solid, sure enough,
tangible,
true, twenty-four-carat,
valid,
visible,
weightyAntonyms:
ethereal,
mental,
spiritual
